scary squirrel world

DON'T BLAME CANADA

Click to hear Canadian skwerls' hideous chitters

Patriots, scary squirrel world's published several features on the skwerlien menace and its Canadian connections. As a result, we've received a number of letters complaining that we unfairly blame Canada for unleashing the bushytail horde on the world.

Interestingly enough, the writers aren't Canadian. We figure they're just deviant skwerlhuggers with a grudge against the truth. In fact, Canadians themselves seem all too willing to accept responsibility for the chitterboxes and their plan for squirrel world domination. However, as any visitor to Canada will tell you, Canadians are always saying "sorry" to something. So, we view these confessions as part of Canada's all-around good nature.

In any event, the most recent objection to our alleged Canada bashing came from a reader commenting on our Cult of the Black Skwerl feature:

Bonjour to you for I am LOvey Canuck,

Why do you say to us that the Canadian hippies brought the black squirrel to your world? It is not so and you are a bad website place!!!!!

And besides for that, all the little squirrels are so nice-nice-nice that you should be tres jolie that you have all the squirrels to love regardless of what colour they are, oui-oiu!?!

Leaving aside that LOvey Canuck sounds suspiciously like our insane photo editor, LOvey Squirrel, and that we actually concluded that the chittering tarballs were created by a lightning strike on a tar pit in Los Angeles, and the Canadian hippie thing was just one of many theories researched for the Black Skwerls story, we find it necessary to put to rest the rumors that we're anti-Canadian once and for all.

First off, it's no secret that some Canadians blame the USA for creating the maniacal black nutkin, either as part of a genetic engineering experiment gone wrong, or as the result of a nuclear accident (click pic to hear typical Canadian express his opinion).

Second, we think Canada is great! The people are friendly, some cool tv shows are filmed there, they've got baseball, and the bushytailed tree rats are just as likely to freeze to death as to cause mayhem. Heck, in some ways, it's a lot like the States. Well, except for Quebec - which is more like Louisiana was 200 years ago but with electricity and paved roads...

And this brings us to a report from Patriot Dufrene in Louisiana (he also refers to our Black Skwerl feature):

I live and hunt in Louisiana and can tell you firsthand that we have a black sguirrel population here but your geo-map did not list it. Also the fact sheet claimed something about a guy from Canada bringing these black ones here about 50 yr.s ago

Maybe so. But the black squirrels here seem to be a rare color phase (malanism-the opposite of albinoism) to be exact because the blackness appears in all three of the fox species we have, and also in the two grey species (but they tend to be very rare).

I know this because I have taken them from all parts of the state - from what I gather they are not a different species, but black squirrels tend to come from predominitly black parents like a genetic trait. In most parts they're rare, but in some i have seen they are quit abundent.

we also have a white color phase found here that is not albino - their eyes are black not pink.

just thought I'd share this little bit of info with you although I no longer hunt them anymore - they still intrige me nonetheless.

ed note: based on Patriot Dufrene's report we've updated our Black Skwerl geo-map

There you have it, Patriots. Our definitive disclaimer that we aren't Canada bashers and evidence that suggests that Louisiana is to blame for the Cult of the Black Skwerl.

Of course, there are those who insist that Canada is the original source of the black chitterdemons. So we're giving folks on both sides the opportunity to express there opinion using the handy poll below...