No review of Tufty the Traffic Safety Squirrel's propaganda machine would be complete without examples of the seemingly innocent, skwerl-free games found in Tufty's annual publication, The Tufty Annual.

For example, the 1969 annual features a simple maze on page 17, Willy Weasle's Game (click pic for large version 167k). The goal is to guide a weasel through the Furryfolk Woods to Mrs. Wise Owl's school. A wrong turn and the weasel ends up in Tufty's Summer House, the Bun Rag and Bone Merchant Hut, or worst of all, Uncle Ben's Castle House (a place so horrible it isn't pictured).

As most Patriot's know, Willy Weasel is Tufty's most violent thug. If you've listened to The Lollipop Man (see link below), you know that this goon would rather buy automatic weapons than attend school. Obviously, this maze isn't what it seems.

So, what is the real message in Willy's game? Our experts spent the better part of a hour figuring how to get through the maze. They then reached these conclusions:

The game offers easy access to Tufty's Summer House. In fact, the house is strategically located to catch the eye of anyone looking at the game. The pleasing name, the carnival tent appearance of the structure, and the easy access enourage the unsuspecting to accept the false promises of squirrel world domination rather than pursue knowledge.

The grim-looking school discourages participants from going all the way. Note the odd "Hansel and Gretel" look to the roof and the darkened windows. Clearly, no adult, let alone a child would enter this crypt. Thus, the game player is subliminally encouraged to look elsewhere, even if it means submitting to Tufty's despotic authority.

The crooked path is the only path: as anyone with 1/2 a brain can tell you, crooked paths are equated with criminal intent and activity. The game prohibits you from taking the straight as an arrow "main road". Clearly, the player is discouraged from keeping on the "straight and narrow" and forced to follow Tufty's devious alleyways to squirrel world domination.

There you have it, Patriots. More proof that Tufty the Traffic Safety Squirrel has only one thing on his mind: enslaving you beneath his pyramid of squirrel world domination.

But don't just take our word for it. Through the miracle of java script and DHTML, we've put the Willy Weasel Game online for your consideration. Note, that this is a very simple game intended for young children. However, we're certain that you will agree with our experts' conclusions after you try it.

To play, click on the link below. The game opens in a new window and is best viewed with your screen resolution set at 800x600. The game should work in Internet Explorer 4+ and Netscape 4.6 or better. Give the graphics a minute to load...