EXPOSED: THE SHROUD OF TUFTY
As most Patriots know, some skwerlverts claim that the head of the Squirrel Enforcement Army (SEA), Tufty the Traffic Safety Squirrel, died in the 1970's.
Tufty was supposedly replaced by a look-a-like who himself was replaced by another when he passed on (and so on).
In essence then, the pathetic skwerlhuggers say there's been a line of Tuftys over the years, each ascending to command the bushytail horde. Right. (Click Tufty for comment)
As for the deceased Tuftys, they were supposedly wrapped in shrouds and buried in secret locations. The exact number of Tuftys has never been revealed. Thus, the number of shrouds is unknown.
However, the blasphemous adherents of Orthodox Skwerlhuggery have a different, more "mystical" take on these so-called shrouds.
They believe that the individual shrouds aren't really shrouds at all. They're actually pieces of the One True Napery of Tufty (i.e. a tea cloth). The blasphemers claim that the Napery covered the table at which Tufty sat when he was imbued with immortality by the Nice Squirrel. Later, the Napery was cut up and distributed as if the pieces were saintly relics.
In any event, various shrouds surfaced over the years. Each is different. Four were found in England; one in Canada. The one pictured below is the fifth Shroud of Tufty. We recently acquired it out of Stockport, England.
Of course, our careful examination of each shroud leads to the conclusion that they are nothing more than discarded hankies. Nonetheless, the controversy continues...
So, we offer you the opportunity to give your opinion. Are the shrouds simply a hoax manufactured by delusional skwerlverts? Are they used hankies tossed aside by youthful, but sickly members of the SEA's Tufty Club? Are the pieces part of the Napery? Or are they the death shrouds of the Tuftys, the leaders of the SEA, including Tufty himself?
Consider the evidence by clicking on the links below; then you decide...
RELATED SITES/TOPICS
TUFTY EXPOSED
IS THIS SKWERL NICE?
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