scary squirrel world SCIENCE IN ACTION

Patriots, every year scientists spend thousands of hours and millions of dollars delving into the mysteries of science. Some of this work takes place at colleges and universities, some in private laboratories, and some in government facilities.

Much of what is discovered has nothing to do with anything, like alternative energy and stem cell research.

But occasionally, science stumbles upon a really important discovery. One that helps us in our righteous struggle against squirrel world domination. Thus, we present our archived reviews of science in action: the scientific research and discoveries that directly affect and/or expose the bushytail horde for the drooling despots they are...

Seeing Red: Study shows skwerls use infrared strategy to defeat snakes, but is the study really a front for robotic nutzy development?

Looking for Mr. Goodskwerl: Do skwerls engage in altruistic behavior?

Is Skwerlhugery a Disease? Does the parasite Toxoplasma gondii cause skwerlhuggery?

Hot to Hump: science exposes skwerlien debauchery and an uncertain future for humankind.

Dress For Success: Skwerls as masters of disguise? Our conclusion will shock you.

Chew On This: Food affects a skwerl's vigilance. News we can use to defeat the slavering skwerlballs...

A Soar Subject: The scientific community is especially remiss in it's understanding of the bushytail horde's evolutionary and historical threat...

Skwerlpocalypse Now: Do skwerls have ESP? Maybe not, but they seem to know something we don't...

A Sik-Sik Story: Science teaches us that skwerls may be good for something. We'll let you judge for yourself...

Silence of the Skwerls: Early research indicated that skwerls could silently command pathetic skwerlhuggers and ignorant citizens to do their bidding...

The Bad Brains: While conducting a study of Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease (CJD) in 1997, a University of Kentucky research team observed an affected patient who had a history of eating squirrel brains...

Let It Snow: Arctic ground squirrels are one the coolest critters around -- literally. That's because during their hibernation in arctic climates, they cool their body to below freezing and still survive...

When Chitter Turns to Chat: Why do we have the gift of gab but humankind's greatest threat does not? New research led by Svante Paabo at the Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology in Leipzig, Germany, reveals that two critical mutations appeared roughly 200,000 years ago...

 

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