scary squirrel world SKWERL FOLKLORE SERIES

As most Patriots know, at the head of today's bushytail horde, the Squirrel Enforcement Army, is the infamous Tufty the Traffic Safety Squirrel.

Tufty burst upon the scene in the 1960's with his Tufty Club and it's manifesto of terror (see link below). But who preceded Tufty?

To answer that question we bring you our series...


before tufty, there was...

IN 1951, A YOUNG FEDERICO THE SKWERL WAS LESS INTERESTED IN GATHERING NUTS AND MORE INTERESTED IN SQUIRREL WORLD DOMINATION. HE CONSIDERED HIMSELF SPECIAL...

IN A WAY, FEDERICO WAS SPECIAL BECAUSE HE COULD FLY, GLIDE ACTUALLY. BUT WHAT FEDERICO WAS REALLY GOOD AT WAS SABOTAGE.

IN FACT, AS FEDERICO REACHED HIS PRIME, HE'D ADVANCED FROM HARRASSING FOREST AND FARM ANIMALS TO TAKING DOWN PHONE AND UTILITY LINES.

IN TIME, FEDERICO BUILT HIMSELF A SMALL ARMY OF LIKE-MINDED CHITTERBOXES WITH ONE GOAL: TO ENSLAVE THE LOCAL HUMAN POPULATION.

FORTUNATELY, CATTY-KIT THE KITTEN WAS ON TO THE PLAN. HE FEIGNED ALLIANCE WITH FEDERICO AND HIS BUSHYTAIL HORDE, FINALLY LEADING FEDERICO INTO A TRAP...

SCENES FROM FEDERICO THE FLYING SQUIRREL
click thumbnails for large, hi-res versions

  

  

  

  

  

THE TRAP THAT AWAITED FEDERICO WAS A LIFETIME OF SERVITUDE GATHERING WALNUTS FOR HIS CAPTOR, BILLY. FEDERICO'S GANG DISPERSED. FEDERICO HIMSELF DIED PERFORMING THE LABOR HE SO DISPISED AS A CHILD.

OR AT LEAST THAT'S HOW THE STORY GOES... HOWEVER, RUMOR HAS IT THAT FEDERICO ACTUALLY STOWED AWAY IN A CRATE OF WALNUTS BOUND FOR CELEBES WHERE HE JOINED A BAND OF MALAYSIAN PIRATES OPERATING OUT OF MAKASAR (UJUNG PANGDANG) IN 1953.

FEDERICO'S CURRENT WHEREABOUTS ARE UNKNOWN.

COMMENTS
   

BEFORE TUFTY THERE WAS...
THE HELPFUL FRIENDS
SQUEAKY THE SQUIRREL
CHIPMUNK WILLIE
SASSY THE SQUIRREL
HAPPY JACK SQUIRREL
RUSTY THE SQUIRREL
BANNERTAIL THE SQUIRREL
PERRI THE SQUIRREL
FRISKY THE SQUIRREL
WHIFFET THE SQUIRREL
THE FUZZY WUZZY SQUIRREL
CHIP-CHIP THE CHIPPY
RIKKI THE LITTLE RED SQUIRREL
CYRIL THE SQUIRREL
THREE SMART SQUIRRELS AND SQUEE



CLICK HERE FOR OUR TUFTY EXPOSED PAGE


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