CAMPUS ALERT!!! PATRIOTS, GET YOUR WHACKIN' STICKS!

Squirrels are taking over our colleges and universities, corrupting students and faculty.
The latest report comes from the University of Central Florida, Orlando, Florida

Squirrels are taking over UCF and I'm they're latest victim...

I was riding my bike on campus (at the University of Central Florida) and I see a squirrel and this squirrel looks like he/she wants to cause some ruckus... so, I swerve to avoid said creature, but it had death (or at least dismemberment) in mind because as I swerved away from it, it swerved toward me!

So, I tap on my brakes to give the thing time to scamper away... but as I hit my brakes the little furball must have decided that it really wanted to see what was under my wheel because it then tried to run headlong into it. As I am still in motion, I now slam on my brakes like a spaz and come within inches (if that) of hitting the damn thing.

Instead, I proceed to fall off my bike! Well, fall over with my bike is more like it... meanwhile the squirrel decides it doesn't really like my wheel and scampers up a tree.