| scary squirrel world Scary Squirrel World |
From: Justin
To: scarysquirrel@scarysquirrel.com
Subject: Campus Alert!
Date: Tue, 8 Dec 1998 21:31:22 -0600Hello,
my name is Justin and i attend the University of Oklahoma in Norman. We here at OU have noticed the squirrel infestation for some time. The furry things run rampant, occupying trees, bushes, and the occasional bench.A friend of mine (rest his soul) first saw your page and began spreading some shocking information: squirrels are mischievous masterminds bent on using the human race for their nut-gathering purposes. Not many people believed him at first (i didn't either, i'm sorry to say), until the tragedy happened. One day, my friend went to his anthropology class and never came back. His bookbag was later found, peppered with traces of brown fur and spots of blood. No one knows for sure, but we believe his disappearance is directly connected with his anti-squirrel sentiments.
After that momentous day, we never spoke about scary squirrel world. But the squirrels know... just the way they look at us and follow us around... they know. We're on to them. I just hope that they never find out about this e-mail...i'm risking my life to bring this to you. Lately, the squirrels have been massing and squirrel activity has been on the rise. People say they're just preparing for winter, but we think they're planning to start the first wave of their new world order on our campus.
Frankly, we're all pretty scared. Any help you can give would be more than welcome.
Avoid the Trees and the Burgoo,
Justin F, a patriot to the end
