When looking at your list of schools that had sent in alerts to your page I was shocked not to see the U of Minnesota on the list.

As a very large school, I would think many people would have written in to warn about the problem. Like many other campuses we have the fat squirrel problem, students eat as they go to class and the little buggers eat the scraps straight form the trash. When walking on the mall you can hardly take one step without seeing one squirrel after another, and in the winter all you see is their tiny little tracks in he snow. it is maddening!

Now, I came to school not knowing about the menace of squirrels, I come from a semi-rural area that has animals which take care of many of the squirrels, and I thought it was weird that so many squirrels were running around, but i felt they were mostly harmless.

Was I ever wrong. One day while sitting on the mall i watched as one of those worthless rodents brazenly walked up to me and began to sniff my hand. I thought it was cute; OH God was I wrong; he then bit me as if I was to be his dinner (click pic to hear skwerl's hideous chitter).

That was when my resistance to squirrels began. I started slow throwing footballs at them trying to hit them. But it all went down when we cut the vines off our house in the spring. Nestled in the vines were three nests of the vermin. Well, they fell and fell hard that day. The squirrels lost what looked like one of their homebases.

It was a great victory against the fuzzy menace but more still needs to be done. The vines have grown back and with them probably the squirrels. I call apon all college students all across the land to stand united against this constant threat to our civilization!

-Patriot Paavo