scary squirrel world SKWERLS TERRORIZE UNIVERSITY OF MAINE!

CAMPUS ALERT!!!
PATRIOTS,
GET YOUR WHACKIN' STICKS!

Squirrels are taking over our colleges and universities, corrupting students and faculty.
The latest report comes from the University of Maine at Orono!

FROM PATRIOT IAN

Umaine appears to be in danger.

Whilst on our usual trek back to my dorm room after creative english, my friends and I noticed unusual skwerlien activity around these piles of leaves. At first, we thought the piles were ordinary and man-made. It was Brad, my companion who noticed increased skwerl activity coming and going from and between the piles. Upon closer inspection, it was found that rations were being stored.

Some might dimly think that the skwerls were just storing nuts for the winter... but,Will, my other chum, brilliantly surmised that an attack was soon upon us. We rushed to my room to issue this warning, the skwerls are on the offensive at umaine!

Patriot Ian

PATRIOTS, DON'T LET OUR BRAVE STUDENTS PERISH!!!

IS YOUR SCHOOL OVERRUN BY THE SQUIRREL HORDE,
OR HAVE YOU FREED YOUR SKOOL OF SKWERLS?
Send your report to scary squirrel world.
We will inform anti-squirrel activists everywhere!

 

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