| scary squirrel world | ITHACA COLLEGE SKWERL-DUCK CONSPIRACY! |
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CAMPUS ALERT!!!
PATRIOTS, GET YOUR WHACKIN' STICKS! |
From: Jennie
To: scarysquirrel@scarysquirrel.com
Subject: Campus Alert!
Ithaca College campus is overrun by squirrels AND DUCKS. Ducks are everywhere! They drink out of muddy puddles and other wet unsanitary pools. These fearless-feathered-freaks squawk at pedestrians letting them know that their treading on duck turf. They're clearly controlled by the squirrels.
It's only a matter of time before students are out-numbered by these damn dirty DUCKS! When that happens, the squirrels will order a final duck strike against us! Please! Send help!!!!