CAMPUS ALERT!!!

PATRIOTS, GET YOUR WHACKIN' STICKS!

Squirrels are taking over our colleges and universities, corrupting the youth of America. The latest report comes from Brevard College in Brevard, North Carolina.

Subject: Albino Squirrels...
Date: Tue, 10 Mar 1998 15:23:45-0500
From: Michael mm@corp.com
To: scarysquirrel@scarysquirrel.com

To whom it may concern:

Not long ago, while visiting my brother at Brevard College, I was stunned to see WHITE ALBINO squirrels chatting away amongst the tall oaks. Now... if it had just been one, I wouldn't have been all that phased... but there were WHOLE FAMILIES of them cavorting about the campus like they owned the place! An old timer later told me that Brevard is famous for these squirrels. Can you believe it?

Why just this particular little town? Is it in the air or water? Could they be dangerous? Am I over-reacting? Aaargh!!! Please... I need advice!!!

Michael

scary squirrel world notes that white and albino squirrels are found in other areas of the country. Roadside America regularly reports on this phenomena. However, this is the first known sighting of these white devils on a college campus. It is a matter of great concern!

A READER COMMENTS

The report of albino squirrels on Brevard College’s campus is a little wrong. They are not albino because they have dark eyes, not pink as would be found in albino squirrels. They are just a color variety of the common grey squirrel. Check out http://www2.brevard.edu/whitesquirrel/origins.html for a good article describing this phenomenon. Also check out http://www2.brevard.edu/whitesquirrel/pics.html for some pictures.

~Jay Austin